Monday, May 02, 2005

In My Eyes

This is gross, so consider it one of my off-topic random posts.

I have pink eye. I got it from my own personal germ vector who happens to be the four year old that lives in my house. My doctor once referred to children as little nuclear incubators of germs. Currently, I am listing pink eye as number six on the top ten list of reasons not to have kids. I'm working out the rest of that list.

For the uninitiated, pink eye falls into two flavors: viral and bacterial. The green oozey stuff gluing my eye shut is apparently evidence that I have become the host for bacteria. It also means I can deal with it via antibiotic drops. The viral version can stick around for weeks.

This morning, I woke up with my right eye stuck shut and swollen. I walked around in my shorts yelling "Cut me Mick. Cut me!" but got no attention and no laughs. I have been on drops for about 24 hours and they seem to be helping.

I'm glad I can handle the drops because I am very squeamish when it comes to my eyes. I don't wear contact lenses because the thought of putting my finger in my eyes is antithetical to a million years of evolution that impels me to protect my vision. I am incapable of getting most things out of my eyes without sticking my entire head into a bucket of water or under a running faucet. So, the drops made me nervous.

Happily, I heard somewhere that a drop in the corner of your eye next to your nose will find its way into your eye with a few blinks. Turns out it works and my eye is clearing up. That's good because it is very disconcerting to see snot coming out of your eyes.

No comments: